I wish I knew that consistency trumps motivation every time when I was starting my journey.
The Days My Feelings Lied to Me
When I first started trying to get in shape, I relied entirely on motivation. If I woke up and “felt like” going to the gym, I went. If I didn’t, I’d roll over and go back to sleep. My progress was, unsurprisingly, nonexistent. I wish I had known then that motivation is a fickle, fleeting emotion. Discipline is a system. The days I forced myself to go, even when I felt unmotivated, were the days that built the real foundation. Consistency is the boring, unsexy secret to achieving anything worthwhile.
I wish I knew to focus on building systems and habits, not just setting goals, when I was 18.
The Goal Without a Plan
At 18, my goal was to “get a six-pack.” It was a great goal, but I had no system to achieve it. I’d just do a bunch of crunches whenever I felt like it. I never reached my goal. I wish I had known to focus on the system instead. A system would have been: “I will do a core workout every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday,” and “I will eat protein at every meal.” The goal is the destination, but the system is the vehicle that actually gets you there.
I wish I knew to take progress pictures because the mirror lies when I first started working out.
The Photo That Saved Me From Quitting
Two months into a new workout program, I was ready to give up. I looked in the mirror every morning and saw the exact same person. I was convinced all my hard work was for nothing. Discouraged, I scrolled through my phone and found a “before” picture I had taken on day one. I put it side-by-side with a photo from that morning. I was stunned. The slow, day-to-day changes were invisible to me, but the photographic evidence was undeniable. The mirror showed me a moment; the photos showed me progress.
I wish I knew that failure is just a data point, not a final verdict, when I was younger.
The Missed Lift That Made Me Stronger
I was attempting a new personal record on my squat and failed. The weight crushed me, and I had to dump it on the safety bars. My first feeling was shame. I felt like a failure. But my workout partner had a different take. “That’s not failure, that’s data,” he said. “The data shows your form broke down at the bottom.” We used that information to work on my technique. The next week, I lifted it easily. I wish I had known that every “failure” is just a lesson in disguise, telling you exactly what you need to fix.
I wish I knew to build one habit at a time instead of trying to change everything at once.
The New Year’s Resolution Graveyard
Every January 1st, I would declare war on my old self. I’d try to start working out, quit junk food, wake up earlier, read more, and meditate, all at the same time. By February, I would be so overwhelmed that I’d have abandoned everything. I wish I had known about the power of focusing on one single “keystone” habit. If I had just focused on getting to the gym three times a week, the other positive changes—like eating better and sleeping more—would have followed naturally as a domino effect.
I wish I knew that comparing myself to others was the fastest way to kill my progress.
The Instagram Feed That Stole My Joy
When I first started my fitness journey, I followed all the big fitness influencers on Instagram. I’d look at their perfect, chiseled physiques and then look at my own starting point and feel completely hopeless. The comparison was so demoralizing that it made me want to not even try. I wish I had known that I was comparing my chapter one to someone else’s chapter twenty. The only person I should have been competing against was the person I was the day before.
I wish I knew that the goal isn’t to be perfect, but to be consistent, when I was starting out.
The “All or Nothing” Trap
My perfectionism was my biggest obstacle. I had a “perfect” diet plan. If I ate one “bad” thing, I’d think, “Well, I’ve ruined the day,” and proceed to eat junk food for the rest of it. The same went for my workouts. If I couldn’t do my full, perfect routine, I’d just skip it entirely. I wish I had known that a “good enough” workout you do consistently is infinitely better than a “perfect” workout you rarely do. Consistency beats perfection every single time.
I wish I knew that true confidence comes from keeping promises to yourself.
The Stack of Small Wins
I spent years trying to “fake it ’til you make it.” I’d tell myself affirmations in the mirror, but I never felt genuinely confident. It was all a performance. The real change happened when I started focusing on building a reputation with myself. I made a tiny promise: I will drink a glass of water every morning before my coffee. I kept it. Then I added another small promise. Each kept promise, no matter how small, was a vote of confidence in myself. It was proof that I could rely on me.
I wish I knew to stop consuming and start doing when I was watching endless videos.
The Man Who Knew Everything and Achieved Nothing
I became an expert on self-improvement. I watched hundreds of hours of videos on fitness, productivity, and style. I could have given a lecture on the topics. But I was still out of shape, disorganized, and poorly dressed. I was in “analysis paralysis,” mistaking the consumption of information for actual progress. I wish I had known to just pick one single piece of advice and take action on it. One workout I actually did was worth more than a thousand videos I watched.
I wish I knew this was a lifelong journey, not a 30-day challenge, when I was 20.
The Finish Line That Kept Moving
At 20, I was always looking for a quick fix. I’d do a “30-day shred” or a “21-day diet,” thinking that at the end, I would be “done.” But I’d always revert to my old habits, and the results would disappear. It was an exhausting cycle of starting and stopping. I wish I had known then that health and self-improvement aren’t a project with an end date. They are a lifestyle, a continuous process. The goal isn’t to reach a finish line, but to enjoy the journey of becoming a better version of yourself.