Use your actual measurements to find your size, not the number on the tag.
Stop Trusting the Tag. Start Trusting the Tape.
You ordered a dress in your usual size, expecting it to fit just like the last thing you bought. The reality? It arrived and wouldn’t even zip. The disappointment hit hard, making you feel like your body was the problem. You thought you knew your size, but you only knew a meaningless number. Stop letting a tag dictate your self-worth. Instead, grab a tape measure. The moment you take your own measurements and buy clothes based on a brand’s specific size chart, the game changes. The clothes arrive, and they fit perfectly. The power isn’t in their number; it’s in yours.
Use structured fabrics that skim your curves, not flimsy materials that cling.
Stop the Cling. Start to Skim.
You bought a dress made of a thin, flimsy jersey, hoping it would be comfortable and forgiving. You expected it to drape nicely. The reality? It clung to every curve, roll, and bra line you didn’t want to showcase, making you feel self-conscious and exposed all day. Stop wearing fabrics that betray you. Instead, try a dress in a structured knit or a quality woven material. The instant you feel it skim over your body, smoothing your silhouette without hiding your shape, is a revelation. You’re not hiding; you’re being perfectly, powerfully framed.
Stop doing what you think is “flattering.” Do wear the styles, colors, and prints that make you happy.
Stop “Slimming.” Start Shining.
For years, you wore black, A-line dresses because you were told they were “flattering” and “slimming.” You expected to feel good about yourself. The reality? You just felt boring and invisible, like you were apologizing for your existence. Stop dressing to disappear. Instead, buy that bright, bold, printed dress that makes your heart sing. The moment you walk out the door wearing a color you love, radiating joy and confidence, you’ll get more compliments than any “slimming” black sack ever got you. The most flattering thing you can wear is your own happiness.
Stop hiding in baggy, shapeless clothes. Do define your waist with a belt or tailored pieces.
Stop the Tent. Start the Triumph.
You threw on a big, baggy tunic, thinking it would hide your stomach and make you feel more comfortable. You expected to feel less noticeable. The reality is that the shapeless “tent” of fabric actually made you look larger and feel frumpy. Stop hiding your shape and accidentally magnifying it. Instead, take a simple belt and cinch that same tunic at your natural waist. The transformation is instantaneous and electrifying. You suddenly have a waist, a shape, a powerful silhouette. You haven’t hidden a thing; you’ve revealed your knockout figure.
Use a professional bra fitting to find your true size, not guessing and wearing an unsupportive bra.
Stop the Guesswork. Start the Lift-Off.
You’ve been buying bras in the same size for a decade, guessing it was right. You expected it to be “good enough.” The reality is a life of digging straps, a riding-up back band, and zero actual support, which ruins the fit of every top you own. Stop accepting bad support as your fate. Instead, get a professional bra fitting. The moment a pro puts you in your true size, the world changes. Everything is lifted, supported, and comfortable. Your posture improves. All your clothes suddenly look a thousand times better. It’s a foundational earthquake of confidence.
Stop doing what’s “safe.” Do experiment with horizontal stripes, bold patterns, and bright colors.
Stop the Rules. Start the Rebellion.
You’ve religiously avoided horizontal stripes your whole life because a magazine told you they’d make you look wider. You expected to look slimmer by playing it safe with solid colors. The reality is you just looked and felt invisible. Stop following rules made by people who want you to shrink. Instead, go try on that bold, striped t-shirt. The moment you see yourself looking confident, stylish, and cool, you’ll realize it was all a lie. Breaking that stupid, outdated rule feels like a thrilling, victorious rebellion.
Use high-waisted styles to elongate your legs, not low-rise pants that cut you in half.
Stop the Slice. Start the Stretch.
You tried on a pair of low-rise jeans, a trend you were told was back. You expected to look stylish. The reality is they cut right across the widest part of your hips, chopped your torso in half, and made your legs look shorter. It was an unflattering disaster. Stop letting trends do you dirty. Instead, slide into a pair of high-waisted jeans. The instant effect is pure magic. Your waist is defined, your torso is balanced, and your legs look a mile long. You haven’t just put on pants; you’ve given yourself a supermodel’s proportions.
Stop shopping at the few stores that have a plus-size section. Do explore the world of online, plus-size-first brands.
Stop the Sad Section. Start the Celebration.
You used to go to the mall, trekking to the sad, forgotten “plus-size” corner in the back of the department store. You expected to find clothes, but the reality was a depressing selection of polyester sacks and matronly prints. Stop accepting the leftovers. Instead, dive into the world of online brands that design for plus-size bodies first. The moment you see their websites—filled with trendy, high-quality, beautifully designed clothes on models who look like you—is a revelation. It’s not a section; it’s a celebration.
Use shapewear as a tool for smoothing, not as a device for shrinking yourself.
Stop the Squeeze. Start the Smooth.
You’ve squeezed yourself into suffocating shapewear, hoping it would magically make you three sizes smaller. You expected to look thin. The reality was a day of pain, restricted breathing, and awkward bulges where the shapewear ended. Stop trying to shrink yourself into oblivion. Instead, think of shapewear as a tool for creating a smooth canvas. A comfortable, light-control short or brief just smooths out lines under a slinky dress. The goal isn’t to be smaller; it’s to make your killer outfit look even more seamless and polished. That’s a power move, not a punishment.
Stop doing what magazines tell you to do. Do follow plus-size bloggers and influencers for real-world inspiration.
Stop the Fantasy. Start the Reality.
You used to flip through fashion magazines, seeing clothes on models who looked nothing like you. You expected to find inspiration, but the reality was just a feeling of alienation and a sense that great style wasn’t for you. Stop looking for advice in places that ignore you. Instead, curate your social media feed with stylish, confident plus-size creators. The moment you see someone with your body type rocking a trend you were afraid to try, everything clicks. It’s not a fantasy anymore; it’s real, achievable, and incredibly inspiring.
Stop doing your regular online shopping. Do seek out indie designers who offer custom sizing.
Stop “Off the Rack.” Start “Made for Me.”
You’ve been trying to find your size in the rigid, unforgiving world of standard online retail. You expect clothes to fit your body. The reality is you’re trying to fit your body into their clothes, and it’s a constant battle. Stop the frustration. Instead, seek out the growing world of indie designers who offer custom sizing. The first time you order a piece made to your exact measurements, the experience is life-changing. It arrives, and it fits perfectly, because it was literally made for you. That’s a level of luxury and validation mass-market brands can never offer.
Stop doing what’s available. Do demand more and better options from mainstream brands.
Stop Settling. Start Shouting.
You’ve passively accepted the limited, boring options that mainstream brands offer in your size. You expect that this is just the way it is. The reality is your silence is enabling their laziness. Stop being a quiet, grateful customer. Instead, start demanding more. Email brands. Comment on their social media posts asking why their plus-size options are so limited or why they don’t carry extended sizes in-store. The moment you realize your voice and your money have power is the moment you shift from a passive consumer to an active agent of change.
Stop doing what’s modest and unassuming. Do take up space with bold silhouettes and confident style.
Stop Shrinking. Start Soaring.
You’ve been taught to dress in a way that minimizes your presence—dark colors, simple shapes, nothing too loud. You expect to avoid judgment by being unassuming. The reality is you’re just making yourself invisible. Stop trying to shrink. Instead, put on that dress with the giant puff sleeves or that coat in a brilliant, look-at-me color. The moment you decide to take up your rightful space in the world, unapologetically and with style, is a feeling of pure, exhilarating power. You’re not hiding from the world; you’re commanding its attention.
Stop doing what’s convenient. Do take the time to read reviews from other plus-size shoppers.
Stop the Gamble. Start the Intel.
You see a cute dress online and you buy it on impulse, expecting it to look as good as it does in the photo. The reality is a game of chance—the fit is weird, the fabric is cheap. Stop gambling with your money. Instead, take five minutes to do some recon. Scroll down and read the reviews from other plus-size customers. They are your secret agents, providing crucial intel on fit, fabric, and whether an item is true to size. The thrill of ordering something with confidence, knowing it’s going to fit, is a rush convenience can’t buy.
Stop doing what you’ve been told. Do break every single “plus-size fashion rule” you’ve ever heard.
Stop the Rules. Start the Riot.
You’ve lived your life by a list of “rules”: no horizontal stripes, no big prints, no white pants, no sleeveless tops. You expect these rules to save you from ridicule. The reality is they are a prison that keeps you from experiencing the joy of fashion. Stop obeying. Instead, make it your mission to break every single one of those stupid rules. Wear the stripes. Rock the crop top. The moment you wear the thing they said you “couldn’t” and realize you look amazing is a jolt of pure, rebellious freedom. It’s not just an outfit; it’s a riot.
Stop doing what’s expected. Do wear a bikini, a crop top, or anything else you’ve been told you “can’t” wear.
Stop the “Can’t.” Start the “I Can.”
For years, the world has told you that your body “can’t” wear a bikini, “can’t” wear a crop top, “can’t” wear short shorts. You expected to feel safe by covering up. The reality is you just felt left out of the summer, left out of the fun. Stop listening to the “can’ts.” Instead, buy the damn bikini. Wear the crop top. The first moment you walk onto the beach or into a party wearing the very thing you were told was not for you, the feeling is not fear—it’s an electrifying, sun-on-your-skin triumph. You haven’t just put on clothes; you’ve claimed your body back.
Stop doing what’s easy. Do build a relationship with a good tailor.
Stop “Almost.” Start “Perfect.”
You find a dress that’s “almost” perfect—the waist is a bit too high, the bust is a little tight. You buy it anyway, because finding plus-size clothes is hard enough. You expect to live with “almost.” The reality is it never feels quite right. Stop settling. Instead, find a good tailor. A tailor is a magician who can turn an “almost” into an “absolutely perfect.” They are your secret weapon. The feeling of putting on a garment that has been sculpted to fit your body perfectly is a luxury and a confidence boost that is worth every single penny.
Stop doing what’s popular for straight-size fashion. Do find what works for your unique body shape.
Stop the Trend Trap. Start Your Own.
You see a trend that’s popular on straight-size influencers and you try to replicate it, expecting it to work the same way. The reality is it often doesn’t, because the clothes weren’t designed with your body’s proportions in mind, leading to frustration. Stop trying to force a trend that isn’t built for you. Instead, get to know your own unique, beautiful shape and find the silhouettes that make you feel like a goddess. The moment you stop chasing their trends and start creating your own is the moment you become a true style icon.
Stop doing what’s comfortable in a bad way. Do challenge yourself to try a style that scares you a little.
Stop the Comfort Zone. Start the Confidence Zone.
Your closet is full of the same “safe,” comfortable clothes you’ve worn for years. You expect comfort to be the ultimate goal. The reality is your comfort zone has become a style rut, and it’s boring you to tears. Stop prioritizing comfort over confidence. Instead, challenge yourself to try on one thing that scares you a little—a bold jumpsuit, a form-fitting dress, a pair of leather pants. The adrenaline rush you feel when you look in the mirror and realize, “I can actually pull this off,” is the spark that ignites a whole new, more exciting chapter of your style.
Stop doing what’s “slimming.” Do focus on what’s empowering.
Stop Shrinking. Start Empowering.
You’ve spent your life chasing the “slimming” outfit. The dark colors, the vertical stripes, the empire waists. You expect these clothes to make you feel better about yourself. The reality is that an outfit chosen with the sole purpose of making you look smaller just reinforces the idea that smaller is better. Stop dressing to shrink. Instead, ask a new question: “Does this make me feel powerful?” A bold-shouldered blazer or a brightly colored dress might not be “slimming,” but they can make you feel like you can take on the world. And that’s a feeling no optical illusion can beat.
The #1 secret for finding clothes that fit perfectly that brands don’t want you to know is to learn your own measurements and ignore size charts.
Stop the Chart. Start the Tape.
Brands present their size charts as a helpful guide. You expect a size 18 to be a size 18. The #1 secret they don’t want you to know is that their charts are often based on inconsistent, outdated models. Stop trusting their chart. Instead, learn your own three key measurements: bust, waist, and hips. Then, look for the garment’s specific measurements in the description. The only thing that matters is if the garment’s numbers will fit your numbers. This one hack will eliminate 90% of online shopping returns and frustrations.
The #1 hack for avoiding chub rub that fashion magazines don’t want you to know is anti-chafing shorts or sticks.
Stop the Friction. Start the Freedom.
Fashion magazines would have you believe that the only way to wear a dress in the summer is to have a “thigh gap.” You expect chafing to be an unavoidable, painful punishment for your body. The #1 hack they completely ignore is a simple, life-changing product. Stop dreading dresses. Instead, buy a pair of lightweight anti-chafing shorts or an anti-friction stick. The moment you experience a hot summer day, walking for miles in a cute dress with absolutely zero pain, is a feeling of pure, unadulterated freedom. It’s a summer revolution.
The #1 tip for looking amazing in photos that photographers don’t want you to know is to find your best angles and own them.
Stop Hiding. Start Posing.
You shy away from photos, expecting them to be unflattering. Photographers want you to think it’s all about their skill. The #1 tip they know is that it’s all about your angles. Stop letting the camera have all the power. Instead, spend some time in front of a mirror and learn your angles. Find the tilt of your head, the placement of your hand on your hip, the slight turn of your body that makes you feel amazing. The next time someone pulls out a camera, you won’t cringe; you’ll instinctively strike your power pose and own the shot.
The #1 secret for a confident look that the diet industry doesn’t want you to know is that it comes from within, not from a number on a scale.
Stop the Weigh-In. Start the Radiance.
The diet industry has spent billions to convince you that confidence is a prize you win when you hit a certain number on the scale. The #1 secret they don’t want you to know is that it’s an inside job. Stop waiting for the scale to grant you permission to feel good. Instead, focus on radiating confidence from within—through your posture, your smile, your passions. The moment you realize that true confidence is an energy you generate, not a weight you lose, you take back all your power.
The #1 hack for making any outfit look better that stylists don’t want you to know is a great-fitting bra.
Stop the Slouch. Start the Support.
Stylists want you to think the secret to a great look is their complex layering and accessorizing. The #1 foundational hack they all use is much simpler: a great-fitting bra. Stop letting a bad bra ruin your look. A bra that fits correctly lifts your bust, defines your waist, improves your posture, and makes every single top and dress you own hang better. It is the single most important, high-impact garment in your entire wardrobe. It’s the invisible architecture that makes the whole outfit stand up straight.
The #1 tip for finding trendy plus-size fashion that retailers don’t want you to know is to check UK-based brands, which are often ahead of the curve.
Stop Waiting. Start Importing.
You’re waiting for US-based mainstream retailers to catch up and offer the latest trends in your size. The #1 tip they don’t want you to know is that you don’t have to wait. Stop being patient. Instead, start browsing UK-based plus-size brands online. For years, they have been far ahead of the curve, offering more daring, trend-forward, and diverse options than their American counterparts. The moment you realize a whole world of better fashion is just a few clicks away is a game-changer.
The #1 secret for a great fit that designers don’t want you to know is to look for fabrics with a good amount of stretch.
Stop the Stiffness. Start the Stretch.
Designers often use non-stretch fabrics that are unforgiving on curves. The #1 secret they don’t always advertise is that a little bit of stretch is magic. Stop trying to force your body into rigid fabrics. Instead, look for materials with a small percentage of spandex, elastane, or Lycra. This gives the garment the flexibility to hug your curves perfectly without pulling or constricting. It provides a comfortable, custom-like fit that moves with your body, not against it. It’s the secret ingredient for both comfort and a flawless silhouette.
The #1 hack for a comfortable and stylish wardrobe that the fashion industry doesn’t want you to know is to prioritize how you feel over how you look.
Stop the “Look.” Start the Feeling.
The fashion industry wants you to obsess over how you look to others. The #1 hack for a truly great wardrobe is to flip that priority. Stop asking “How do I look?” and start asking “How do I feel?” When you wear clothes that are physically comfortable and make you feel confident, powerful, or joyful, you will naturally look more stylish and attractive than if you were wearing the most “on-trend” but uncomfortable outfit. True style is a feeling that radiates from the inside out.
The #1 tip for elongating your silhouette that editors don’t want you to know is to match your shoes to your pants.
Stop the Chop. Start the Column.
Fashion editors might suggest complex layering to create a longer line. The #1 simplest and most effective tip is at your feet. Stop creating a harsh visual break at your ankles. Instead, match your shoe color to your pants color. Black pants with black boots. White jeans with white sneakers. This simple trick creates one long, unbroken column of color, which instantly and dramatically elongates your entire silhouette and makes your legs look miles long. It’s a simple, powerful optical illusion that works every time.
The #1 secret for true body confidence that the media doesn’t want you to know is to curate your social media feed with bodies that look like yours.
Stop the Comparison. Start the Curation.
The media surrounds you with a single, unrealistic body type, wanting you to feel “less than” so you’ll buy their products. The #1 secret to breaking this spell is to take control of what you see. Stop passively consuming their content. Instead, actively curate your social media feed. Unfollow accounts that make you feel bad and aggressively follow stylish, happy, confident people who have a body type similar to yours. The moment your feed becomes a reflection of reality, your brain starts to normalize it, and the confidence you feel is revolutionary.
The biggest lie you’ve been told about plus-size fashion is that you have to hide your body.
Stop Hiding. Start Highlighting.
For years, you’ve been told the goal of plus-size fashion is to camouflage, conceal, and hide your body. The biggest lie is that your body is a problem to be solved. The reality is that fashion is a tool to celebrate it. Stop dressing in shapeless, dark clothes designed to make you disappear. Instead, wear the bright, form-fitting, bold clothes that you love. The moment you decide to highlight your favorite parts of yourself instead of hiding the parts you don’t, you take back your power and start having fun with style.
The biggest lie you’ve been told about flattering clothes is that they have to be black and shapeless.
Stop the “Flattering” Myth. Start the Fun.
You’ve been conditioned to believe that “flattering” is a code word for a boring, black, tent-like dress. The biggest lie is that this is your only option. The reality is that “flattering” simply means that you feel amazing. A hot pink bodycon dress can be flattering. A brightly patterned jumpsuit can be flattering. A pair of well-fitting jeans and a t-shirt can be flattering. It has nothing to do with color or shape and everything to do with fit and confidence. The most flattering outfit is the one that makes you feel like your best self.
The biggest lie you’ve been told about your body is that it’s a “before” picture.
Stop Waiting. Start Living.
The diet and fashion industries constantly feed you the lie that your current body is just a temporary “before” picture, and that your real life will start after you lose weight. You’re waiting for the “after.” The biggest, most damaging lie is that your life is on hold. The reality is that this body, right now, is your home. It deserves to be adorned in beautiful clothes, to be taken on adventures, to be loved and celebrated today. You are not a “before” picture. You are the whole, damn, finished masterpiece.
The biggest lie you’ve been told about horizontal stripes is that plus-size people can’t wear them.
Stop the Stripe Fear. Start the Style Power.
It’s one of the oldest, most persistent fashion myths: horizontal stripes make you look wider. The biggest lie is that this is some unbreakable law of physics. The reality is that the fit and type of stripe are what matter. A well-fitting striped shirt or dress can look incredibly chic and classic on any body. Stop being afraid of a pattern. The only thing this “rule” does is limit your joy and your options. Wearing horizontal stripes is not a fashion faux pas; it’s a confident move that proves you’re not afraid to break the rules.
The biggest lie you’ve been told about plus-size fashion is that it can’t be high-fashion.
Stop the Stigma. Start the Slay.
You’ve been led to believe that plus-size fashion is limited to cheap, commercial, and basic styles, and that “high fashion” is only for the very thin. The biggest lie is that style and size are mutually exclusive. The reality is that plus-size bodies are just as capable of looking avant-garde, chic, and high-fashion as any other. Thanks to trailblazing designers and stylists, the world is slowly waking up to this fact. Your body is a canvas for art, not just for “flattering” basics.
The biggest lie you’ve been told about your size is that it dictates your worth.
Stop the Size Obsession. Start the Self-Love.
From a young age, you’ve been told, directly and indirectly, that the number on the scale or the size on the tag is a measure of your beauty, your health, and your worth as a person. The single biggest lie is that your size has anything to do with your value. The reality is that your worth is inherent and unchangeable. It’s in your kindness, your intelligence, your humor, your passions. Your body is simply the vessel that carries your incredible self through the world. It is not, and never will be, a measure of your worth.
The biggest lie you’ve been told about crop tops is that you need a flat stomach to wear one.
Stop the Stomach Rule. Start the Style Statement.
You’ve seen crop tops and thought, “I could never wear that.” You’ve been sold the lie that you need a perfectly flat, toned stomach to earn the right to wear one. The reality is the only thing you need to wear a crop top is a body. The key is styling. Pairing a crop top with a high-waisted skirt or pants creates a chic, balanced silhouette that shows just a sliver of skin at the narrowest part of your torso. It’s a stylish, confident look that has absolutely nothing to do with having a flat stomach.
The biggest lie you’ve been told about plus-size fashion is that the options are limited.
Stop the Scarcity Myth. Start the Search.
For years, the options were genuinely terrible, and you’ve been left with the impression that there’s still nothing out there. The biggest lie is that your choices are still limited. The reality is that thanks to the internet and a host of amazing new brands, there has been an explosion of stylish, high-quality, and trend-forward plus-size fashion. The options are vast and exciting, from indie designers to international retailers. You just have to know where to look. The scarcity mindset is a holdover from a bygone era; today is a world of abundance.
The biggest lie you’ve been told about your arms is that they need to be covered.
Stop Sleeving. Start Freeing.
You spend every summer in cardigans and long sleeves, because you’ve been told that your arms are a “problem area” that should be hidden. The biggest lie is that any part of your body needs to be concealed in shame. The reality is they are just arms. They let you hug people you love and carry things you need. The moment you decide to wear a sleeveless top or a tank dress and feel the sun and the breeze on your skin is a moment of pure liberation. You’re not just freeing your arms; you’re freeing yourself.
The biggest lie you’ve been told about your body is that you need to dress for it. You should dress for yourself.
Stop Dressing Your Body. Start Dressing Your Soul.
Every fashion magazine tells you to “dress for your body type”—apple, pear, hourglass—as if your body is a problem that needs a strategic, sartorial solution. The biggest lie is that you should dress your body. The reality is you should be dressing your soul, your personality, your mood. Wear what makes you feel joyful, powerful, creative, or comfortable. When you stop trying to “flatter” a shape and start trying to express a self, you will find a style that is more authentic and more magnetic than any rule-based outfit could ever be.
I wish I knew this about the power of a well-fitting pair of jeans when I was a teenager.
The Denim Revelation
As a plus-size teenager, I thought jeans were a form of torture. I only ever found pairs that were tight in the thighs and gapped at the waist. I wish I knew then about the transformative power of a truly well-fitting pair of jeans. I didn’t know about brands that cater to curves or the magic of a little bit of stretch. The first time I put on a pair that hugged my hips, fit my waist, and made me feel amazing was a revelation. It wasn’t my body that was the problem; it was the bad jeans I had been trying to squeeze into.
I wish I knew this about the existence of amazing plus-size bloggers when I was feeling alone in my style journey.
The Community I Missed
Growing up, I never saw anyone who looked like me in fashion magazines. I felt completely alone, like I was the only one who couldn’t find clothes that were cool and stylish. I wish I knew then that there was a whole universe of amazing, creative, and confident plus-size bloggers and creators online. If I could have seen them experimenting with fashion, breaking the rules, and loving their bodies, it would have been a lifeline. It would have shown me that I wasn’t alone and that a vibrant, stylish life was possible for me too.
I wish I knew this about how to measure myself properly when I was first shopping online.
The Sizing Nightmare
My first forays into online shopping were a disaster. I would just guess my size, or order my usual department store size, and nothing ever fit. It was a constant cycle of disappointment and frustrating returns. I wish I knew then the simple, empowering skill of taking my own measurements. If I had known to use a tape measure for my bust, waist, and hips and compare those numbers to the brand’s size chart, I would have saved myself years of frustration. It’s the secret code that unlocks the entire world of online shopping.
I wish I knew this about the confidence that comes from wearing clothes that actually fit when I was squeezing into smaller sizes.
The Squeeze of Shame
For years, I would buy clothes that were a size too small, hoping to motivate myself to lose weight or just trying to deny my actual size. I’d spend my days feeling constricted, uncomfortable, and constantly aware of how tight my clothes were. I wish I knew then that wearing clothes that actually fit is a radical act of self-love. The moment I finally bought a pair of pants in my real size and could breathe and move freely, the confidence I felt was enormous. It was a feeling of acceptance, not failure.
I wish I knew this about the “rules” of plus-size fashion (and how to break them) when I was younger.
The Rulebook of Shame
When I was younger, I lived by a strict, unwritten rulebook: no bright colors, no bold prints, no horizontal stripes, no form-fitting clothes. I wish I knew then that these “rules” were just tools of shame, designed to make me hide my body. If I had known the exhilarating freedom that comes from breaking those rules—from wearing the brightest, boldest, most “unflattering” thing I could find—I would have started having fun with fashion so much sooner. I would have learned that style is about self-expression, not self-suppression.
I wish I knew this about the importance of a good bra when I was 20.
The Foundational Flaw
At 20, I thought a bra was just a bra. I bought cheap ones, guessed my size, and paid no attention to support. I wish I knew then that a good bra is the absolute foundation of a great outfit. I didn’t realize that my ill-fitting bras were making my clothes hang poorly, giving me bad posture, and causing me discomfort. A professional fitting and an investment in a high-quality, supportive bra would have been the single most impactful style decision I could have made. It changes everything from the ground up.
I wish I knew this about the joy of wearing bright colors when I was hiding in black.
The Colorless Closet
My closet used to be a sea of black, grey, and navy. I thought these dark, “slimming” colors were my only safe option. I wish I knew then about the pure, unadulterated joy of wearing color. I was hiding, trying to be invisible, and my wardrobe reflected that. The first time I bought and wore a bright yellow dress, I felt like I was seeing in color for the first time. The compliments I received were one thing, but the way it made me feel—vibrant, happy, and alive—was everything.
I wish I knew this about the community of plus-size fashion lovers online when I was starting out.
The Lonely Island
When I was first developing my style, I felt like I was on a lonely island. The fashion world I saw in magazines didn’t include me. I wish I knew then that there was a thriving, supportive, and incredibly creative community of plus-size fashion lovers just a click away. On blogs and social media, there were people sharing tips, celebrating their bodies, and creating amazing looks. Finding that community would have made me feel seen, understood, and so much less alone on my journey.
I wish I knew this about the difference a tailor can make when I was settling for ill-fitting clothes.
The “Good Enough” Trap
I used to buy clothes that were “good enough.” The pants were a little too long, the jacket sleeves were awkward, but I just accepted it as the reality of plus-size shopping. I wish I knew then that a tailor is a miracle worker. I thought tailoring was a luxury for the rich. I didn’t realize that for a small price, a tailor could make my affordable clothes look like they were expensive, custom-made pieces. It would have transformed my entire wardrobe from “good enough” to “absolutely perfect.”
I wish I knew this about my own worth, regardless of my size, when I was a young woman.
The Waiting Game
As a young woman, I lived my life as if it were a waiting room. I was waiting to lose weight to wear nice clothes, to go on dates, to apply for that job, to really start living. I wish I knew then, with every fiber of my being, that my worth was never in question. I wish I knew that I was deserving of joy, love, and a vibrant, fulfilling life at any size. I was putting my own life on hold for a number on a scale, and I lost years to that waiting game.
I’m just going to say it: The term “flattering” is a tool of the patriarchy to make us obsessed with looking smaller.
The “F” Word
We are obsessed with the word “flattering.” But what does it really mean? 99% of the time, it’s just code for “makes you look thinner.” I’m just going to say it: the entire concept of “flattering” is a tool used to keep us preoccupied with shrinking ourselves. It’s a way to ensure we are always judging our bodies against an impossible ideal. Let’s delete the word from our vocabulary. Let’s stop asking “Is it flattering?” and start asking “Does it make me feel powerful? Does it bring me joy?”
I’m just going to say it: A lot of “body positivity” has been co-opted by brands to sell more products.
The Commercialization of Confidence
“Body positivity” started as a radical political movement. Now, it’s a hashtag used by fast-fashion brands to sell you a t-shirt. I’m just going to say it: the movement has been completely co-opted and sanitized by capitalism. Brands use images of slightly curvier models and slap on a “love yourself” slogan to make you feel good about buying more stuff you don’t need. It’s often a marketing ploy, not a genuine commitment to dismantling the systems that make us hate our bodies in the first place.
I’m just going to say it: Just because a brand offers plus sizes doesn’t mean they’re doing a good job of it.
The Token Effort
A brand proudly announces they are extending their size range, and everyone applauds. But I’m just going to say it: simply offering plus sizes is not enough. Often, these brands just scale up their straight-size patterns, resulting in clothes that fit terribly—weirdly long arms, no room for a belly or bust. Or they only offer their most boring, basic pieces in plus sizes. This token effort is not true inclusivity; it’s a lazy, half-hearted attempt to get our money without doing the actual work of designing for our bodies.
I’m just going to say it: The obsession with a specific hourglass shape is just as toxic as the obsession with being thin.
The Hourglass Prison
In the plus-size community, we’ve rightfully rejected the ideal of thinness. But we’ve often replaced it with another rigid beauty standard: the perfect, curvy hourglass. I’m just going to say it: this new ideal is just as toxic. It still tells people who are apple-shaped, rectangular, or have a smaller bust that their bodies are wrong. We haven’t achieved true body liberation if we’ve just swapped one narrow beauty standard for another. All bodies—and all fat bodies—are good bodies, not just the ones that fit a specific, “acceptable” curvy shape.
I’m just going to say it: It’s okay to not love your body every single day.
The Pressure of Positivity
The “body positivity” movement can sometimes create a new kind of pressure: the pressure to feel ecstatically in love with your body 24/7. I’m just going to say it: that’s an impossible standard. It’s okay to have days where you feel insecure or just neutral about your body. It’s okay to not feel “positive.” A more realistic and compassionate goal is body neutrality—accepting your body as it is, without judgment, and recognizing that it is the vessel for your life, regardless of how you feel about its appearance on any given day.
I’m just going to say it: The plus-size fashion industry still has a massive diversity problem.
The Same Old Story
We celebrate when we see a plus-size model in a campaign. But look closer. It’s often the same type of model: a white or light-skinned woman who is a size 14/16 with a perfect hourglass figure. I’m just going to say it: the industry has a huge diversity problem. Where are the dark-skinned models? Where are the visibly fat, size 24+ models? Where are the models with different body shapes, abilities, and gender identities? True representation means showcasing the full, beautiful spectrum of the plus-size community, not just the most palatable version of it.
I’m just going to say it: Calling clothes “brave” for being worn on a plus-size body is condescending.
The “Brave” Backhanded Compliment
When a plus-size person wears a bikini or a crop top, the comments often pour in: “You’re so brave!” I’m just going to say it: calling a person “brave” for simply wearing clothes is incredibly condescending. It implies that their body is so offensive that it requires an act of courage to show it in public. It reinforces the idea that our bodies are a battleground. We are not brave for wearing a swimsuit. We are just… wearing a swimsuit. Let’s stop celebrating the “bravery” and start normalizing the bodies.
I’m just going to say it: The constant discourse around “what’s flattering” is exhausting. Wear what you want.
The Flattering Trap
Every plus-size fashion article, every comment section, is obsessed with one word: “flattering.” Is this flattering? Will that be flattering? I’m just going to say it: I am exhausted by this discourse. The concept of “flattering” is a trap designed to keep us focused on whether our bodies are acceptable to others. It’s a waste of our time and energy. Here’s a revolutionary idea: let’s stop worrying about what is “flattering” and just wear what makes us feel good. The end.
I’m just going to say it: Oversized clothes on plus-size bodies can be a chic, intentional style choice, not just a way to hide.
The Oversized Misconception
There’s a prevailing idea that if a plus-size person wears oversized clothing, it must be because they are ashamed and trying to hide their body. I’m just going to say it: this is a simplistic and often false assumption. An oversized, architectural silhouette can be a deliberate, high-fashion style choice. It can be about playing with proportion and volume. It doesn’t automatically equal insecurity. Plus-size people deserve the same freedom to experiment with all kinds of shapes and silhouettes without their motives being questioned.
I’m just going to say it: We need more plus-size representation in high fashion, not just commercial campaigns.
The Commercial Ceiling
It’s great that we’re seeing more plus-size models in e-commerce and commercial print ads for mainstream brands. But I’m just going to say it: that’s not enough. We are still almost completely absent from the world of high-fashion runways, avant-garde editorials, and luxury campaigns. This sends a clear message that plus-size bodies are seen as suitable for buying clothes, but not as aspirational or artistic canvases. We don’t just want to be consumers of fashion; we want to be part of its creative vision.
99% of plus-size women make this one mistake when shopping: they buy clothes that are too big to hide their bodies.
The Tent Theory
You’re shopping, and you feel insecure about your stomach or your hips. So you grab a top or a dress that’s a size or two too big, thinking the extra fabric will hide your “flaws.” And 99% of plus-size women make this mistake. The reality is that wearing a shapeless “tent” of a garment doesn’t hide your body; it just makes you look bigger and erases your shape entirely. Wearing clothes that actually fit and skim your curves is always more flattering than drowning in fabric.
99% of people make this one mistake when buying jeans: they don’t pay attention to the rise.
The Rise and Fall of Fit
You’re trying on jeans, and you’re so focused on the fit in the leg and the waist that you forget about the most important element. And 99% of people make this mistake: they ignore the rise. The rise—the distance from the crotch to the waistband—determines where the jeans sit on your body, and it can completely change your proportions. A high rise can elongate your legs and define your waist, while a mid-rise might be more comfortable. Finding the perfect rise for your specific body shape is the true secret to jean-shopping success.
99% of plus-size shoppers make this one mistake when they find something they like: they don’t buy it in multiple colors.
The Unicorn Mistake
You’re a plus-size shopper, and you’ve just found a pair of pants or a dress that fits you perfectly and makes you feel amazing. It’s a rare “unicorn.” You buy it in one color and leave. And 99% of plus-size shoppers make this mistake. When you find a piece that truly works for your body, you must not hesitate. If it comes in other colors or patterns that you also love, buy them immediately. You may never find that perfect fit again. It’s not over-shopping; it’s smart, strategic wardrobe building.
99% of women make this one mistake when getting dressed: they choose their outfit based on what they want to hide, not what they want to highlight.
The Hide-and-Seek Style
You stand in front of your closet and think, “I feel bloated today, so I need something to hide my stomach.” And 99% of women make this mistake: they dress from a place of defense, focusing on their perceived “flaws.” This leads to a negative mindset and a boring wardrobe. The game-changing shift is to dress from a place of offense. Ask yourself, “What part of me do I want to celebrate today?” Maybe it’s your great legs, your shoulders, or a new necklace. Highlighting what you love is a more joyful and stylish strategy than hiding what you don’t.
99% of plus-size people make this one mistake when trying a new trend: they wait for permission to wear it.
The Permission Slip Fallacy
A new trend emerges—maybe it’s cut-outs or a certain color. You love it, but you wait. You wait to see other plus-size people wearing it, you wait for an article to tell you how to style it “for your shape.” And 99% of plus-size people make this mistake: they wait for permission. Fashion is not a test you need a hall pass for. If you love a trend, be the first person you see wearing it. The confidence to just go for it is what makes you a trendsetter, not a follower.
99% of online shoppers make this one mistake when buying plus-size clothing: they don’t read the reviews for feedback on fit.
The Review Blindspot
You’re shopping online, and you find a cute top. The pictures look great, so you add your size to the cart. And 99% of shoppers make this crucial mistake: they don’t scroll down. The review section is a goldmine of critical information, especially for plus-size shoppers. Other people will tell you if the item runs small, if it has any stretch, if the arms are too tight. Taking two minutes to read the reviews from people with similar body types is the single most effective way to avoid the disappointment of a bad fit.
99% of people make this one mistake when wearing a belt: they place it at the widest part of their waist instead of the narrowest.
The Belt Blunder
You want to define your waist with a belt over a dress or a tunic. You place the belt right around your belly button, often the widest part of your torso. And 99% of people make this mistake. A belt is meant to create the illusion of an hourglass shape by emphasizing your narrowest point. For most people, this is higher up, right under the bust (an empire waist). Finding and cinching that sweet spot will instantly create a more defined and flattering silhouette.
99% of plus-size individuals make this one mistake when it comes to fashion: they think they have to wait until they lose weight to have good style.
The “Someday” Style Syndrome
You have a closet full of clothes you don’t love, and you tell yourself, “I’ll buy nice things when I lose 20 pounds.” And 99% of plus-size people make this heartbreaking mistake. They put their own style and self-expression on hold, believing they have to earn the right to look good. Your life is happening right now, in the body you have today. You are worthy of feeling beautiful, confident, and stylish this very moment. Good style is not a reward for weight loss; it’s a tool for living a happier life today.
99% of people make this one mistake when shopping for plus-size clothes: they forget to check the men’s section.
The Gendered Aisle Mistake
You’re looking for a great jacket, a cozy sweater, or a classic button-down shirt, and you confine your search to the women’s section. And 99% of people make this mistake. The men’s section is a hidden gem for plus-size shopping. Men’s clothing is often made with more generous cuts, more durable fabrics, and without the dreaded “puffy sleeve” or weird frills. An oversized men’s denim jacket or a heavyweight hoodie can be the perfect, effortlessly cool piece you were looking for.
99% of brands make this one mistake when designing for plus sizes: they just size up their straight-size patterns without considering proportions.
The “Grade Up” Greivance
A brand decides to offer plus sizes, so they take their size 8 pattern and just make it bigger everywhere. And 99% of brands make this lazy mistake. They don’t understand that plus-size bodies have different proportions. Just “grading up” results in clothes with weirdly long arms, narrow shoulders, and no room for a stomach or a larger bust. Truly inclusive design requires creating a separate pattern and fit model for plus sizes. Without this, they’re not really designing for us; they’re just making their existing clothes bigger.
This one small habit of following diverse plus-size creators will change the way you see yourself forever.
The Mirror Effect
You used to scroll through social media and see only one type of body, which made you feel isolated and abnormal. But this one small habit will change your brain: aggressively curate your feed. Unfollow accounts that make you feel bad and actively seek out and follow a diverse range of plus-size creators—different sizes, shapes, ages, and ethnicities. When your daily visual input is filled with people who look like you, living happy, stylish lives, it rewires your perception of “normal” and allows you to finally see yourself as beautiful.
This one small action of getting professionally fitted for a bra will change the way your clothes fit forever.
The Foundation Fix
You used to think your tops just didn’t fit right; they’d pull and gap in weird places. But this one small action will be a revelation: get a professional bra fitting. The moment an expert puts you in the correct size, everything changes. Your bust is lifted and supported, your waist is instantly more defined, and suddenly all those tops that you thought were the problem now hang perfectly. It’s the single most transformative style fix you can make, because you’re not fixing the clothes; you’re fixing the foundation they sit on.
This one small thing, a dress that makes you feel amazing, will change the way you view your body forever.
The Dress of Defiance
You’ve spent years hiding in clothes, trying to be invisible. But this one small thing, a dress that fits you perfectly and makes you feel like a goddess, will change everything. It might be a bright color, a bold print, or a silhouette you were told you “couldn’t” wear. The first time you wear it out and feel the power and confidence it gives you, you’ll realize your body was never the problem. It was just waiting for the right clothes to celebrate it in. That dress becomes a symbol of defiance against every negative thing you’ve been told.
This one small habit of “shopping your closet” will change the way you appreciate the clothes you already have forever.
The Hidden Treasures
You used to look at your closet and think, “I have nothing to wear,” prompting another shopping trip. But this one small habit will change your perspective: once a month, “shop your own closet.” Pull things out and challenge yourself to create new combinations you’ve never tried before. You’ll be amazed at the hidden gems and new outfits you can create without spending a dime. It fosters creativity and gratitude, making you fall back in love with the clothes you already own.
This one small action of taking a full-body photo of your outfit will change the way you understand your style forever.
The Objective Eye
You get dressed, look in the mirror, and you’re not sure if the outfit really “works.” But this one small action will give you instant clarity: take a quick, full-body photo with your phone. For some reason, seeing the outfit on a screen gives you a more objective, third-person perspective than a mirror does. You can instantly see if the proportions are right, if the colors work, and if it looks the way you thought it did. It’s a simple, powerful tool for editing your look and understanding your own style.
This one small thing, a great pair of well-fitting jeans, will change the way you get dressed every day forever.
The Denim Dream
You used to believe that jeans were just a source of frustration—always gapping at the waist or too tight on the thighs. But this one small thing, the discovery of a single brand or style of jeans that fits your body perfectly, will change your daily life. That one pair becomes the reliable, comfortable, go-to foundation for dozens of outfits. It eliminates the daily “what to wear” struggle and gives you a fail-safe option that always makes you feel confident and put-together. It’s not just a pair of pants; it’s peace of mind.
This one small habit of ignoring the size tag will change your relationship with clothes forever.
The Tag Tyranny
You used to let the number on the size tag dictate your mood. If you had to go up a size, you felt like a failure. But this one small habit will set you free: completely ignore the number. Size is just an arbitrary, inconsistent measurement that differs from brand to brand. The only thing that matters is how the clothes fit and feel on your body right now. When you stop giving that little number power, you liberate yourself from a major source of anxiety and can finally focus on what really matters: your style.
This one small action of wearing something you’ve been told you “can’t” will change your definition of confidence forever.
The Forbidden Fruit
There’s a piece of clothing you’ve always loved but have been told is not for you—a crop top, a bold print, a bodycon dress. But this one small action, deciding to wear it anyway, will be a revelation. The moment you step outside in your “forbidden” outfit and realize that the world doesn’t stop, and that you actually feel amazing and powerful, your brain rewires. You understand that confidence isn’t about following rules; it’s about having the courage to break them.
This one small thing, a bold lipstick, will change the way you approach fashion as self-expression forever.
The Lipstick Effect
You used to feel like your simple outfits were boring. But this one small thing, a swipe of a bold, confident lipstick, will change everything. It’s an instant statement. It shows you are intentional, polished, and not afraid to be seen. A great lipstick can elevate a simple t-shirt and jeans into a “look.” It’s a powerful reminder that fashion and self-expression are in the details, and that sometimes the most impactful style choice has nothing to do with your clothes at all.
This one small habit of celebrating your body as it is today will change the way you live your life forever.
The End of the Waiting Room
You used to live in the “waiting room” of life, telling yourself you’d do things—wear the nice clothes, go on the trip—after you lost weight. But this one small habit will change your entire existence: start celebrating the body you have right now. Buy the dress. Book the ticket. Post the photo. When you stop putting your life on hold and start treating today’s body as worthy of joy and celebration, you finally exit the waiting room and start actually living.
The reason your plus-size outfits aren’t working is because you’re still dressing by old, outdated “rules.”
The Rulebook Prison
You’re trying to build a stylish wardrobe, but your outfits feel boring and uninspired. The reason they aren’t working is because you are still, consciously or unconsciously, following a set of outdated “rules” designed to make you hide. You’re avoiding bright colors, steering clear of bold prints, and always reaching for “slimming” silhouettes. Your style is trapped in a prison of fear-based rules. The moment you decide to burn the rulebook and wear what you truly love is the moment your style will finally come alive.
The reason you feel like you have nothing to wear is because your closet is full of “someday” clothes, not clothes for your body right now.
The “Someday” Trap
You stare into a closet packed with clothes, yet you feel completely uninspired. The reason you have “nothing to wear” is because your closet is a museum of “someday.” It’s filled with clothes that are a size too small (“for when I lose weight”) or clothes for a fantasy life you don’t lead. You have nothing for the real, beautiful body you have right now. The solution is to get rid of the “someday” clothes and invest in pieces that make you feel amazing today.
The reason your clothes don’t look like they do on the model is because you haven’t found the right styles for your unique body shape.
The Shape Shift
You buy a dress that looked amazing on a plus-size model, but on you, it just doesn’t sit right. The reason it’s not working isn’t that your body is “wrong”; it’s that you have a different, equally valid body shape. The model might have an hourglass figure, while you might be more apple- or pear-shaped. The key is to stop trying to replicate her look and start learning about your own beautiful geometry. Finding the silhouettes that celebrate your unique shape is the secret to making clothes look incredible on you.
The reason you lack confidence in your style is because you’re comparing yourself to unrealistic and edited images online.
The Comparison Thief
You see an endless stream of perfect, airbrushed bodies on social media, and it makes you feel terrible about yourself and your own style. The reason you lack confidence is because you are letting comparison be the thief of your joy. You are comparing your real-life, unposed body to a highly curated, filtered, and often edited highlight reel. The solution is to radically curate your feed. Unfollow accounts that make you feel bad and fill your screen with a diverse range of bodies. Change your input, and you will change your outlook.
The reason your attempts to find trendy plus-size clothes aren’t working is because you’re only looking in brick-and-mortar stores.
The Retail Desert
You walk through the mall, and you’re frustrated by the complete lack of trendy, exciting plus-size options. The reason your search is failing is because you are looking in a retail desert. For plus-size fashion, the real oasis is online. There is a vast and growing universe of online-only brands, from the UK, Australia, and the US, that are creating the trend-forward, high-quality fashion you’re looking for. You have to stop relying on the mall to cater to you and start exploring the incredible world that’s just a click away.
The reason your outfits feel boring is because you’re afraid to experiment with color and print.
The Beige Prison
You look at your wardrobe and it’s a sea of black, grey, and navy. You feel safe, but you also feel incredibly bored with your style. The reason your outfits are boring is because you are living in a self-imposed prison of neutral colors. You are afraid that color or print will “draw attention” to you. The moment you give yourself permission to wear a vibrant color or a bold, exciting print, your entire relationship with fashion will change. It will become a source of joy and self-expression, not just a tool for blending in.
The reason your clothes are uncomfortable is because you’re buying a smaller size in the hopes of fitting into it.
The Squeeze Play
You spend your days pulling at your clothes, feeling constricted and uncomfortable. The reason your clothes are a constant source of discomfort is because you are trying to squeeze your current body into a smaller, aspirational size. You are choosing a number on a tag over your own physical well-being. The moment you decide to buy clothes that fit the body you have today, you will experience a profound sense of physical and mental relief. Comfort is not a luxury; it’s a right.
The reason your search for the perfect jeans isn’t working is because you’re not paying attention to fabric and stretch.
The Denim Deception
You’ve tried on dozens of pairs of jeans, and none of them seem to fit your curves correctly. The reason your search is failing is because you’re only looking at the cut, and not the composition. The secret to a great fit for a curvy body is often in the fabric. Look for a denim with at least 2% spandex or elastane. This small amount of stretch allows the jeans to mold to your hips and thighs without gapping at the waist. It’s the hidden ingredient that makes all the difference.
The reason your plus-size style journey is frustrating is because you’re blaming your body instead of the clothes.
The Blame Game
You try on an item and it doesn’t fit well. Your immediate, conditioned response is to think, “My stomach is too big,” or “My arms are the problem.” The reason your journey is so frustrating is because you are playing the blame game, and you’re blaming the wrong player. It is not your body’s job to fit into the clothes. It is the clothes’ job to fit your body. If they don’t, the clothes have failed, not you. This simple mindset shift is the key to a happier and more successful relationship with fashion.
The reason your efforts to be body positive aren’t working is because you’re forcing it instead of practicing self-compassion.
The Positivity Pressure
You look in the mirror and you try to force yourself to think, “I love my body!” but it feels like a lie. The reason your efforts at body positivity are failing is because you’re trying to jump from hate to love, which is an impossible leap. A more effective path is to practice self-compassion and body neutrality. Start with, “This is the body I have, and I will treat it with respect today.” This gentle, compassionate approach is a much more sustainable and realistic foundation for building a better relationship with yourself.
If you’re still waiting to lose weight to buy nice clothes, you’re losing the chance to live your life to the fullest right now.
The Waiting Room of Life
You’re putting off buying that beautiful dress or those amazing jeans until you hit a certain number on the scale. If you’re still doing this, you are losing. You are losing precious days, weeks, and years of your one wild and precious life. You are treating your current self as a temporary inconvenience. You deserve to feel beautiful, confident, and joyful in your clothes today. Life is not a dress rehearsal for a thinner version of you. The show is happening right now.
If you’re still hiding in black, you’re losing the joy and self-expression that comes with color.
The Colorless Void
Your wardrobe is a sea of black because you believe it’s “slimming” and “safe.” If you’re still hiding in black, you are losing out on the incredible, mood-boosting power of color. You are losing the chance to express your personality and your energy to the world. You’re choosing to be a shadow when you could be a vibrant painting. Wearing a color you love is an act of joy, a declaration that you are not afraid to be seen. You’re losing a whole spectrum of happiness.
If you’re still wearing clothes that don’t fit, you’re losing your comfort and your confidence.
The Constriction of Confidence
You’re squeezing into clothes that are a size too small, or drowning in clothes that are a size too big. If you’re still wearing clothes that don’t fit properly, you are losing on two critical fronts every single day. You are losing your physical comfort, spending your day feeling constricted or sloppy. And you are losing your mental confidence, constantly adjusting your clothes and feeling insecure. Clothes that fit are the non-negotiable price of entry to a comfortable, confident day.
If you’re still following outdated fashion rules for plus-size bodies, you’re losing your personal style.
The Prison of “Rules”
You’re still avoiding horizontal stripes, crop tops, and bold prints because some magazine from 1995 told you to. If you’re still following these outdated “rules,” you are losing the most important thing you have: your unique personal style. You are letting fear, not joy, dictate your wardrobe. You are dressing according to a set of limitations designed to make you hide, and in doing so, you are losing the opportunity to discover the creative, expressive, and fun side of fashion.
If you’re still thinking some styles are not for you, you’re losing the opportunity to discover what you truly love.
The “Not For Me” Fallacy
You see a style—maybe it’s a bohemian dress or a sharp power suit—and you immediately think, “I could never pull that off.” If you’re still telling yourself this story, you are losing countless opportunities for self-discovery. You are closing doors before you’ve even peeked inside. The truth is, you don’t know what’s “for you” until you try it. You might just discover that you feel more like yourself in a style you never expected to love. You’re losing the chance to surprise yourself.
If you’re still avoiding getting your picture taken, you’re losing precious memories.
The Missing Person
Your friends and family are taking a group photo, and you volunteer to be the one to take it, or you hide in the back. If you’re still avoiding the camera, you are losing more than just a picture; you are erasing yourself from your own history. You are losing tangible proof of your joy, your travels, your relationships. Years from now, you will want to see your happy face in those photos, not remember the insecurity that kept you out of the frame. You are losing precious, irreplaceable memories.
If you’re still supporting brands that don’t offer your size, you’re losing your power as a consumer.
The Vote of Your Wallet
You love a certain brand, but they stop making clothes at a size 12. You still buy their bags or their accessories. If you’re still doing this, you are losing your power. Every dollar you spend is a vote. By giving your money to a brand that actively excludes your body size, you are telling them that it’s okay. You’re losing the opportunity to use your powerful consumer voice to support the brands that are actually doing the work to include you and to push the industry forward.
If you’re still talking negatively about your body, you’re losing the chance to be your own best friend.
The Inner Bully
You look in the mirror and your first thought is a criticism. You make self-deprecating jokes about your body with your friends. If you’re still talking to yourself this way, you are losing the most important relationship you’ll ever have. You are allowing an inner bully to run your life. You’re losing the opportunity to be your own cheerleader, your own advocate, and your own best friend. The gentle, compassionate voice you would use for someone you love is the voice you deserve to hear from yourself.
If you’re still thinking of your body as a problem, you’re losing the opportunity to see it as your home.
The Problem Body Myth
You treat your body like a problem to be solved, a project to be fixed, a thing that is standing in the way of your happiness. If you’re still thinking this way, you are losing the profound peace that comes with seeing your body as your home. This body, right now, is the vessel that carries you through the world. It lets you experience joy, taste delicious food, and hug the people you love. It is not a problem. It is your partner in this life, and you’re losing the chance to have a beautiful, lifelong partnership.
If you’re still letting your size hold you back, you’re losing your life.
The Ultimate Loss
You’re not applying for the job, you’re not going to the beach, you’re not signing up for the dance class, all because you’re waiting until your body is different. If you are still letting your size dictate the boundaries of your life, you are not just losing confidence or style; you are losing your life itself. You are trading precious, unrepeatable moments of joy, adventure, and connection for a number on a scale. You are losing the one and only life you have. Please, stop losing. Start living. Now.